Lament of the Broken: Cyclocross Haiku etc

I want to lick the
mud from pink polka dotted
cyclocross skinsuit.

Grass berms climb the stairs
through mud over obstacles.
Urban assault boys
kick the crap out of
sissy tire roadies.

I have to try it.
Grab my mountain bike, clip in.
Take off after them.

My deductible
is met. Future injuries
will be paid in full.

Behind A Steamy Mirror, Look.

4 verses, average 60 per verse, so total is over but...

Awake, but by choice
Tonight avoiding sweet dreams
for sad memories

A relationship?
Versus having relations?
Act honestly? You?

I know you. Inside.
Hear what is behind your words,
selfish child; bully.

Learn some compassion
You can't come into my life,
break my toys. No more.

by anon, 231 characters

I'm not joining AA, no way, no how.

My veins are a still,
moonshine replaces corpuscles.
Barkeep, set me up;
run me a tab.
I'm a joyful drunk.

by anon, 95 characters

WIRED Issue 14.11 - November 2006

We'll be brief: Hemingway once wrote a story in just six words ("For sale: baby shoes, never worn.") and is said to have called it his best work. So we asked sci-fi, fantasy, and horror writers from the realms of books, TV, movies, and games to take a shot themselves.
Dozens of our favorite auteurs put their words to paper, and five master graphic designers took them to the drawing board. Sure, Arthur C. Clarke refused to trim his ("God said, 'Cancel Program GENESIS.' The universe ceased to exist."), but the rest are concise masterpieces.

Failed SAT. Lost scholarship. Invented rocket.- William Shatner

Computer, did we bring batteries? Computer?- Eileen Gunn

Vacuum collision. Orbits diverge. Farewell, love.- David Brin

Gown removed carelessly. Head, less so.- Joss Whedon

Automobile warranty expires. So does engine.- Stan Lee

Machine. Unexpectedly, I’d invented a time- Alan Moore

Longed for him. Got him. Shit.- Margaret Atwood

His penis snapped off; he’s pregnant!- Rudy Rucker

From torched skyscrapers, men grew wings.- Gregory Maguire

Internet “wakes up?” Ridicu -no carrier.- Charles Stross

With bloody hands, I say good-bye.- Frank Miller

Wasted day. Wasted life. Dessert, please.- Steven Meretzky

“Cellar?” “Gate to, uh … hell, actually.”- Ronald D. Moore

Epitaph: Foolish humans, never escaped Earth.- Vernor Vinge

It cost too much, staying human.- Bruce Sterling

We kissed. She melted. Mop please!- James Patrick Kelly

It’s behind you! Hurry before it - Rockne S. O’Bannon

I’m your future, child. Don’t cry.- Stephen Baxter

1940: Young Hitler! Such a cantor! - Michael Moorcock

Lie detector eyeglasses perfected: Civilization collapses.- Richard Powers

I’m dead. I’ve missed you. Kiss … ? - Neil Gaiman

The baby’s blood type? Human, mostly. - Orson Scott Card

Kirby had never eaten toes before. - Kevin Smith

Rained, rained, rained, and never stopped. - Howard Waldrop

To save humankind he died again. - Ben Bova

We went solar; sun went nova. - Ken MacLeod

Husband, transgenic mistress; wife: “You cow!” - Paul Di Filippo

“I couldn’t believe she’d shoot me.” - Howard Chaykin

Don’t marry her. Buy a house. - Stephen R. Donaldson

Broken heart, 45, WLTM disabled man. - Mark Millar

TIME MACHINE REACHES FUTURE!!! … nobody there … - Harry Harrison

Tick tock tick tock tick tick. - Neal Stephenson

Easy. Just touch the match to - Ursula K. Le Guin

Special Web-only edition: We were unable to include these 59 stories in the print magazine.

New genes demand expression -- third eye. - Greg Bear

K.I.A. Baghdad, Aged 18 - Closed Casket - Richard K. Morgan

WORLD'S END. Sic transit gloria Monday. - Gregory Benford

Epitaph: He shouldn't have fed it. - Brian Herbert

Batman Sues Batsignal: Demands Trademark Royalties. - Cory Doctorow

Heaven falls. Details at eleven. - Robert Jordan

Bush told the truth. Hell froze. - William Gibson

whorl. Help! I'm caught in a time- Darren Aronofsky and Ari Handel

Nevertheless, he tried a third time. - James P. Blaylock

God to Earth: “Cry more, noobs!” - Marc Laidlaw

Help! Trapped in a text adventure! - Marc Laidlaw

Thought I was right. I wasn't. - Graeme Gibson

Lost, then found. Too bad. - Graeme Gibson

Three to Iraq. One came back. - Graeme Gibson

Rapture postponed. Ark demanded! Which one? - David Brin

Dinosaurs return. Want their oil back. - David Brin

Bang postponed. Not Big enough. Reboot. - David Brin

Temporal recursion. I'm dad and mom? - David Brin

Time Avenger's mistaken! It wasn't me... - David Brin

Democracy postponed. Whence franchise? Ask Diebold... - David Brin

Cyborg seeks egg donor, object ___. - David Brin

Deadline postponed. Five words enough...? - David Brin

Metrosexuals notwithstanding, quiche still lacks something. - David Brin

Brevity’s virtue? Wired saves adspace. Subscribe! - David Brin

Death postponed. Metastasized cells got organized. - David Brin

Microsoft gave us Word. Fiat lux - David Brin

Mind of its own. Damn lawnmower. - David Brin

Singularity postponed. Datum missing. Query Godoogle? - David Brin

Please, this is everything, I swear. - Orson Scott Card

I saw, darling, but do lie. - Orson Scott Card

Osama’s time machine: President Gore concerned. - Charles Stross

Sum of all fears: AND patented. - Charles Stross

Ships fire; princess weeps, between stars. - Charles Stross

Mozilla devastates Redmond, Google’s nuke implicated.- Charles Stross

Will this do (lazy writer asked)? - Ken MacLeod

Cryonics: Disney thawed. Mickey gnawed. Omigawd. - Eileen Gunn

WIRED stimulates the planet: Utopia blossoms! - Paul Di Filippo

Clones demand rights: second Emancipation Proclamation. - Paul Di Filippo

MUD avatars rebel: virtual Independence Day. - Paul Di Filippo

We crossed the border; they killed us. - Howard Waldrop

H-bombs dropped; we all died. - Howard Waldrop

Your house is mine: soft revolution. - Howard Waldrop

Warskiing; log; prop in face. - Howard Waldrop

The Axis in WWII: haiku! Gesundheit. - Howard Waldrop

Salinger story: three koans in fountain. - Howard Waldrop

Finally, he had no more words.- Gregory Maguire

There were only six words left. - Gregory Maguire

In the beginning was the word. - Gregory Maguire

Commas, see, add, like, nada, okay? - Gregory Maguire

Weeping, Bush misheard Cheney’s deathbed advice. - Gregory Maguire

Corpse parts missing. Doctor buys yacht.- Margaret Atwood

Starlet sex scandal. Giant squid involved.- Margaret Atwood

He read his obituary with confusion.- Steven Meretzky

Time traveler's thought: "What's the password?"- Steven Meretzky

I win lottery. Sun goes nova.- Steven Meretzky

Steve ignores editor's word limit and- Steven Meretzky

Leia: "Baby's yours." Luke: "Bad news…"- Steven Meretzky

Parallel universe. Bush, destitute, joins army.- Steven Meretzky

Dorothy: "Fuck it, I'll stay here."- Steven Meretzky

Six Word Novels-it ain't nanowrimo, folks, but it's grand!

The Six-Word Novel

Ernest Hemingway: "For sale: baby shoes, never used."

Irvine Welsh: "Eyeballed me, killed him. Slight exaggeration."

Robert Olen Butler: "Saigon hotel. Decades later. He weeps."

Norman Mailer: "Satan--Jehovah--fifteen rounds. A draw."

Tobias Wolff: "She gave. He took. He forgot."

Augusten Burroughs: "Oh, that? It's nothing. Not contagious."

the truth as i see it

a life is something.
what your heart does not know; sad,
you can never trust.


i love you mommy.
why did you do this to me?
i'll miss you. goodbye.

by george

Assorted Haikus

One: First, do no harm.
Easier said than done. It
bleeds touch, breath, sight.

Rule two: All else is
commentary. Smoke, mirrors
tricks and slight of hand.

Three: It will all work
out. How? When? In my lifetime?
Clock is tick, tick, tick....

In all this, silence.
Refuse to engage, answer.
Guilt, wisdom or fear?

Can I borrow a
cup of sugar, book, scissors,
someone else's life?


by robyn

The Rime of the Ancient Bicyclist

See! Here! I have an
albatross upon my head.
Not only there, but
around my neck, too,
squeezing the breath out...

by robyn
93 characters

In Pittsburgh, It Takes Just 17 Syllables to Tell the G-20 How You Really Feel

From the wall street journal, sept 17, 2009
http://online.wsj.com/article_email/SB125303596299912693-lMyQjAxMDI5NTEzODAxMzg1Wj.html

Haiku Contest Draws the Proud, the Lyrical and the Annoyed; 'We Won't Be Greeting You'

Tanja Cilia, a newspaper columnist in Malta who hates politics but loves the Japanese poetic form known as haiku, recently found the perfect outlet for those diverse feelings.

She entered Pittsburgh's G-20 haiku contest. Conceived by Pittsburgh Filmmakers, a nonprofit that promotes film and other arts in the city, the competition sought the best haiku inspired by next week's summit of the Group of 20 industrialized and developing nations.


"I tend to enter any competition that involves haiku," says Ms. Cilia, a 50-year-old who has written haiku on a range of topics, including how to teach physics to a dog. Her entry for the G-20:

Matinee idols
At the G-20 Summit...
See them in Pittsburgh!

Ms. Cilia says meetings like the G-20 are "a lot of hot air," but she's glad it gave her a chance to put pen to paper.

The haiku contest isn't the only event linked to the meeting. There also will be a beer summit, which includes tasting beers from G-20 summit countries, and a project to let people flash messages at the delegates, using Morse code, from the windows of an office building across the river from the summit. Messages sent to a Twitter account called "heyg20" will be translated into a "multicolored Morse code light show, illuminating not only the night sky but also the concerns of the world's citizens," says Osman Khan, a Pittsburgh-based artist coordinating the effort.

Mr. Khan says the fact that few people can read Morse code is actually in keeping with the larger symbolism of the project: "It's the same lack of transparency that the summit is showing us."

Haiku is a traditional Japanese poetry style that today is written in more than 60 languages, according to some estimates. In its English adaptation, it often contains 17 syllables over three lines of verse. The first and third lines contain five syllables, the second line, seven.

The nearly 160 poems submitted in the Pittsburgh contest include hopeful messages, congenial welcomes, Pittsburgh Steeler cheers and a mix of political messages and pleas for peace. Some appear to disregard the G-20 theme entirely, like one composed by a onetime inmate at the Allegheny County Jail:

I can't feel my face
I thought it's been a whole day
Still the awful stench

Poet Sandra Gould Ford conducted the poetry program last winter for county-jail inmates where that haiku was composed. She says she submitted about a dozen haiku that she thought were particularly good. The one about the "awful stench" is "quirky," she says.

Richard Engel, the marketing director for Pittsburgh Filmmakers, says no haiku was disqualified for being off message, or even for having an irregular syllable count. If a haiku "is good, it's good," he says.

There's no prize for the winner, either -- only what Mr. Engel says is a once-in-a-lifetime chance to have a haiku displayed on a theater marquee a few blocks from where the summit is being held. The spot will be visible to leaders of the world's biggest economies. Among the participants: President Barack Obama, Chinese President Hu Jintao and German Chancellor Angela Merkel.

Some poets expressed frustration with the inconveniences and traffic problems expected to arise from the security clampdown attending the summit. Mary M. Shirey, a 77-year-old retired high-school English teacher, wrote:

Known for friendliness,
We won't be greeting you,
Thanks to congestion.

Other entries, like this one from Jean Kirby, a Pittsburgh software engineer, were more earnest:

what country am I
dying of hunger and thirst
number twenty one

Ms. Kirby, who says she just started writing haiku this past year, is thinking of having that one printed on T-shirts.

Jim Kacian, founder of the Haiku Foundation in Winchester, Va., and author of 14 books, mainly of haiku, notes that Pittsburgh won't be the first place where haiku has appeared on theater marquees. A 1994 program, he says, put haiku on theater marquees in New York's Times Square.

Over the past quarter century, Mr. Kacian says, haiku increasingly has been used for social commentary. Mr. Kacian hasn't seen any of the Pittsburgh submissions, but he doesn't have high expectations.

"We recognize there's Little League baseball and Major League Baseball," he says. Pittsburgh's contest "would be Little League."

Don't tell that to Madelyn Rice. She's 11 and just started sixth grade in the Pittsburgh suburb of Mount Lebanon. Maddy, as she likes to be called, says she appreciates all kinds of poetry, but thinks writing haiku is special "because it's not like writing normal poetry, where it usually needs to rhyme." Her message to the world leaders is that they need to promote peace, an idea that came to her, she says, from watching the nightly news. Her entry:

Countries having peace
This is just a dream right now
But it can happen

The winning haiku, to be announced Thursday, was penned by Angele Ellis, a Pittsburgh community activist and author of a book of poetry delving into issues of her Arab-American identity. She wrote:

we harvest leaflets
blown like autumn leaves: our hopes
speak truth to power

One haiku that didn't take home the gold came from local Manny Theiner. His entry had a hometown feel, and included the word "yinz," Pittsburgh slang for "y'all."

No movies tonight
The drama is in the streets
See yinz on Monday

Mr. Theiner, an organizer of live-music events, declined to discuss his haiku, telling a reporter who reached him by phone, "If you aren't calling to tell me I won, there's nothing for me to talk about."


An Ode to the G-20
The nonprofit group Pittsburgh Filmmakers has solicited G-20-themed haiku ahead of the Sept. 24 to Sept. 25 meeting there. Here are some entries:

Hey you 20 peeps
Please make wise decisions now
Human needs not greed
--Jude Vachon

World leaders arrive
Protesters are also here
Pittsburgh welcomes all
--Carmen J Biondo

G-20 arrives
Autumn global agreements
World markets survive
--Denis Good

Ten billion people --
Environmental debate
Won't feed all those mouths
--Stanley Harms

A Haiku Contest?
Perhaps I should enter it.
Nah, I'm too sleepy.
--Adam MacDonald

Neighbors of the world
Welcome to our three waters
Share with us your peace
--Kelly Lynskey

We may lose our jobs
But no matter what happens
We won't lose our hope
--Joshua Hoey

Lights, camera, action!
Will change make its grand entrance?
Now? For Good? For All?
--Josh Futrell

World leaders meeting
Visiting here and bringing
Protests and traffic
--Iysha Evelyn

Our hard times have passed
We've continued to stand strong
Like our steel, we'll last
--Nichole McGuire

Pittsburgh is our town
This week, it bridges the world
Welcome, one and all!
--Jamie Fritz

Tears are Salt Rain

When you cry, voiceless
How can I? What do I? [deep breath]
You rip my heart out,
Chasing yours, trying, wanting
anything to be your net.

by robyn, 137 characters

the fresh water spring
has never tasted this sweet,
Milagros


This wonderful human being saved my life. I am a lucky man

My Right Foot

My third toe, right foot,
It's name is Bill. It still moves
any way I want.
But one day, maybe
soon, or not, it won't.

by robyn

105 characters

Every Breath You Take

Hummingbird heartbeats,
same beats as mine, that's word count.
Four, three, two, one. TIME!

by robyn

96 characters

WELCOME TO TWIT HAIKU

You like haiku? tenku? sonnets? flash fiction? six word novellas? Submit anything, anything at all to TWIT HAIKU. Keep it to 140 characters or less, we'll print it here. You want to include your real name, email, blog, we'll post that, too. Pens ready? LET'S GET BUSY!